In this age of eggplant emojis and Tinder Roulette, dating is always going to be a tricky pursuit. But when you finally settle down with someone you can relax, right? Wrong. Especially not if their ‘thirsty’ Instagram followers don’t quit (or worse, become emboldened by the challenge).

If this sounds familiar, you’re in a precipitous situation. Do too little and your newfound bae might be whisked away (or think you don’t care about them), do too much and you come across as overbearing and insecure. As always: balance is key.

Unless you are the wife of a $470 million sports star, whose inbox is inundated with ‘leading’ messages 24/7. In which case you light the discretion manual on fire and throw it out the window.

Having been married for two and a half years, it seems Kayla Harper had finally had enough of the clumsy pickup attempts her baseball superstar husband Bryce Harper ‘endures’ from brazen fans, with News.com.au this morning reporting how she took to Instagram to shame one of them.

“Taking to social media, Kayla Harper, who recently announced she and the Phillies’ $330 million man are expecting their first child together, revealed she received a note from one of her husband’s admirers, who accidentally slid into her private messages.”

Awkward.

“Hey handsome,” the message read, along with a photo of a woman, “I’m Jordan (and) I’m just trying to be ya stress reliever.”

Nothing suss here.

Kayla, clearly in agreement with our assessment of Jordan’s motives, dealt with the situation in the way that every low-key jealous partner dreams of: by publically shaming the offender.

Kayla Harper is savage! pic.twitter.com/cfkm2gMB31

— Gina Lewis (@GinaMarie0125) 5 May 2019

Taking a screenshot of Jordan’s post, Kayla then shared the image on her own Instagram story, with her own salty comment imposed over the top: “If you’re going to try & go after a married man the least you could do is be smart enough to message his Instagram account and not his wife’s.”

She then added, according to SportsGossip.com, “@BryceHarper3 are you feeling stressed? I have your solution.”

As News.com.au reports, Bryce Harper signed a 13-year, $330 million ($AU470m) deal (the largest in baseball history) with the Phillies in the off-season, “Hitting .233 with six homers, a National League-leading 25 walks and an .841 OPS in 33 games.”

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Sauntering up to the counter of your nearest boulangerie, you politely ask for a biscuit with your cafe au lait, only to receive a Gallic shrug in response. “Why?”, you ask, as the line moves on, and your ex-server pretends you no longer exist.The answer has less to do with you and more to do with Voltaire. Confused? The following quote from the French literary icon, in which he responds to a priest’s request that he renounce Satan (while lying on his deathbed), might give you a sense of what we’re talking about.

“Now, now my good man, this is no time to be making enemies.”

While Voltaire died in 1778, this devil-may-care attitude lives on. And seeing as religion is in decline both in Europe and France, could it be that Parisians are now taking out their existential angst on tourists?A vast generalisation? Sure. But as anyone who has ever lived in the City Of Love & Surly Serveurs knows, there’s a grain of truth to it.

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A post shared by Janelle Wehsack & Scott Gould (@distantfrancophile) on Apr 29, 2019 at 12:35pm PDT

Legendary English actor and culture-vulture Stephen Fry offers another explanation, comparing anglophone tourists’ native language with the delicate tongue we butcher in our attempts to be understood in Paris.

“The English language is… a mongrel mouthful of Chaucerian, Shakespearean, Miltonic, Johnsonian, Dickensian and American.”

On the other hand, “The French language, like Paris,” he points out, “Has attempted, through its Academy, to retain its purity, to fight the advancing tides of Franglais and international prefabrication.”

“English, by comparison, is a shameless *****.”

Does it follow then that the French—and Parisians in particular, who bear the brunt of the tourism—are extra unfriendly in an unconscious attempt to protect their language?Perhaps.But as journalist Emily Monaco explains in a report for the BBC, foreigners—especially Americans—often misread emotional detachment for resentment, when it is actually a cultural resting state: “If you’re too happy in French, we’re kind of wondering what’s wrong with you.”This is best summed up by Julie Barlow, a journalist and author, who the BBC quotes as saying: “French people prefer to come across as kind of negative, by reflex.”The problem is, over the generations, many Americans—like the famous author F. Scott Fitzgerald—have infused this simple cultural difference with a sense of intellectual hauteur, with statements like: “It is more fun for an intelligent person to live in an intelligent country.”

“France has the only two things toward which we drift as we grow older—intelligence and good manners,” (Scott F. Fitzgerald).

And as many a study (and the collected works of Albert Camus) has shown, smart people have a tendency to be miserable.

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A post shared by Aris Vulgaris (@arisvulgaris) on May 6, 2019 at 9:02am PDT

But then—surely it’s ridiculous to suggest that a city of 2.141 million is exclusively populated by miserable people with a high IQ?Hence the validity of humorist David Sedaris’ theory: Paris’ perceived hostility isn’t complicated—it’s just down to a “big city mentality” found in all corners of the world—from Subway Barging New Yorkers to Sydney Snobs.

“In Paris the cashiers sit rather than stand. They run your goods over a scanner, tally up the price, and then ask you for exact change,” (David Sedaris).

We’d argue that this is the most likely theory. After all: no urban metropolis has time for each visitor to get up to speed. Locals have places to go and people to see—and that doesn’t include waiting for you to extract your wallet from the innards of your oversized suitcase.

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A post shared by Nature (@parisresident) on Apr 30, 2019 at 2:19pm PDT

Besides, as Karen Chance, New York Times bestselling author suggests in the following quote—if you got to enjoy Paris in this life, it would spoil the surprise for the next.

“When good Americans die, they go to Paris.”

Read Next

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The post Why Parisians Are Rude To Tourists appeared first on DMARGE Australia.

Well it’s that time of year again. A time where the hottest celebrities get to unleash their most ‘artistic’ looks onto the world stage all in the name of fundraising. Sure, a simple GoFundMe page would have sufficed…but what would the world be without a bit of erotic funeral cosplay?

Enter Harry Styles. We love the guy for his often daring and gender bending wardrobe pursuits, but this one is probably enough to warrant the question of why he didn’t just wear grandmother’s funeral dress. The lacy Victorian era jumpsuit from Gucci is polarising to say the least and on Harry Styles it does exactly that.

Styles rocked the silky old school number complete with a Victorian brocade cravat, grandmother’s pearl earring (just one because two is for the commoners, darling), mirror polished man heels, lashings of finger jewellery and painted finger nails.

His partner in crime of course was none other than Alessandro Michele, the creative director of Gucci, who despite his talents looked like a rather fabulous Sindarin Elf from Lord of the Rings. Sure guys can dress how they want in this day and age, but it should also be fun to call them out should things get a bit nipple-ly.

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The post Harry Styles Wore His Grandmother's Funeral Dress To The Met Gala appeared first on DMARGE Australia.

When it comes to shopping for sneakers, we imagine many of you will veer towards white or black for colour – unless, of course, you’re after something particularly outlandish for using in the gym. But we’d like to point your attention to the oft-forgotten blue next time you consider investing in a fresh pair of kicks.

Why blue you might ask? Well, not only does it offer something a little different (who really likes to conform, anyway?) but blue sneakers can help accentuate many of your established go-to outfits. Think of the effect a midnight blue dinner jacket has for evening wear, instead of the traditional black, and you should start to see what we mean.

Navy sneakers will obviously be the easiest shade to pair with your current wardrobe, and certain super-minimalist pairs can even lend themselves to being worn with suits (as long as you get it right), making them truly versatile. But for casual and streetwear, any shade of blue will send your style credentials skyrocketing.

Some other helpful DMARGE stories about footwear

• Best Walking Shoes For Men
• Best Green Sneakers For Men

The post 19 Best Blue Sneakers For Men 2022 appeared first on DMARGE Australia.

At the best of times I'm no morning lark. But when I miss my 8am Macchiato I descend into a scatterbrained mess. However, Australian scientists from the University of Monash and Canadian researchers from the University of Toronto have just discovered that I need only envision the steam on my tongue...

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When you think you’ve taken the perfect couple shot only to realise that even the highest quality DSLR camera can’t make you not look like a potato, it’s tempting to lose hope.

That temptation increases tenfold after you scroll through 20 images of a night thinking: surely we both look good in one of these, only to find that you look tipsy in all but one of them (and in that particular photo your partner blinked).

But, given the correct preparation, it’s possible to refine your couple photos to the point where you’ll score upwards of 50,000 likes per shot. Luckily for you, one such couple, Marie Fe and Jake Snow, have taken it upon themselves to reveal their five top tips for taking awesome couple photos.

Here’s what they had to say.

Buy A Tripod

 

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A post shared by MARIE FE & JAKE SNOW (@mariefeandjakesnow) on Feb 20, 2019 at 4:18am PST

While you may be able to convince a third wheel to accompany you to some of the world’s more luxurious locales, if you’re heading off the beaten path with just the two of you it pays to have a tripod to get a more natural—or in the above case, spectacular—result.

Also, perhaps unusually for a couple you might expect to always be spruiking high-end products, they recommend you go for something cheap: “We like to buy sturdy but relatively cheap tripods because we always ruin them by putting them in salt water.”

“If you want to get the ‘shot’ you will need to put your tripod in places it shouldn’t be.”

Frame The Shot

 

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A post shared by MARIE FE & JAKE SNOW (@mariefeandjakesnow) on Feb 4, 2019 at 5:10am PST

We don’t all have an influencer’s physique… But we do all have the ability to frame our shots using the landscapes nature provides us with.

“Composition is key; make sure your place yourselves thoughtfully in the photo.”

As Jake and Marie point out: “An advantage of being a couple is that you can send one person out into the frame to judge where exactly the best place to be is.”

Use this wisely, and, “Be natural and enjoy yourself (because) it is easy to tell if a photo contains true happiness.”

Take Advantage Of Time Lapse Mode

 

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A post shared by MARIE FE & JAKE SNOW (@mariefeandjakesnow) on Apr 18, 2019 at 6:32am PDT

An essential part of taking great couple photos is exploiting your camera’s time-lapse feature, which allows you to capture a more natural-looking scene. As Marie and Jake explain, “After we have framed the shot will set our camera to time-lapse mode and set the time-lapse to shoot 1 photo every 3 seconds.”

“We also set the camera to autofocus mode to make sure the camera stays focused while we move around.”

“Taking your photos this way will lead to much more candid and authentic shots,” they continue, “Instead of standing there waiting for the timer to go off or trying to hide your phone while you use it as a remote, you can just enjoy yourself and the location you are at and let the camera do its thing.”

Download LightRoom

 

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A post shared by MARIE FE & JAKE SNOW (@mariefeandjakesnow) on Mar 2, 2019 at 6:09am PST

To take top tier couple shots, learning how to edit is almost as important as getting a good shot in the first place. According to Marie and Jake, “The powerhouse of editing software is Adobe Lightroom.” And while romantic scenes like the above are priceless Adobe Lightroom is only $14.99…

Try Out Some Presets

 

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Today was the first day we took our camera out and went to explore our new home! @mariefeandjakesnowpresets All we have to say is woweeee Kuala Lumpur, I think this place suits us What do you guys think? Edited with a Sunset Preset from our brand new Preset Pack! Launching Soon#kualalumpur#malaysia#visitmalaysia#malaysiatrulyasia#malaysia#infinitypool#cityscape#sunset#lensbible#stayandwander#agameoftones

A post shared by MARIE FE & JAKE SNOW (@mariefeandjakesnow) on Dec 17, 2018 at 6:20am PST

“If you want to fast forward the learning process in Lightroom and skip to having amazing photos straight up then you can buy some presets.”

“A preset, Jake and Marie explain, “Will automatically adjust the tones, presence, highlights, shadow, colours etc.”

Read Next

• This Luxury Hotel Used Influencers To Advertise…But It Came At An Unexpected Price 
• The Luxury Travel Destination That Is Ruining Travel Influencers’ Credibility 

The post Influencers Reveal The Secret To A Flawless Couple Photo appeared first on DMARGE Australia.

We’ve all been there. Staring nervously at our luggage rolling through the airport security scanner as authorities do double takes of your personal contents. Did they find something I wasn’t aware of? Did your buddies “accidentally” place a phallic shaped instrument in there? Whatever it is, it’s probably not as intriguing as some of the stuff these airport security officers of Reddit have encountered on the frontline of commercial flying.

 

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A post shared by TSA (@tsa) on Oct 15, 2018 at 12:43pm PDT

Whilst many of the flagged objects these authorities discovered were random, it’s their accompanying tales that make them something to behold. Take this first example. Spoons are nothing suspect but when one security officer noticed an entire bag packed with varying spoons, he had to conduct a duty of care to see what the story was. His kinky suspicions were swiftly answered.

“Saw a bag filled to the brim with all different types of spoons. Pulled it aside, asked the passenger what the deal was…he looked me straight in the face and says he uses them to spank his wife in bed. It’s their sex spoons.”

Not all of these flagged security items are bedroom related though. One security officer noted multiple oddball items that even included a severed head.

“Hunter returning from Canada with some unlicensed kills,” said Reddit user Keplar. “Un-prepped and still bleeding severed musk-ox heads wrapped in plastic. Whole baggage system for half the airport had to be shut down and cleaned, along with a couple of our machines.”

Other sightings included and elderly woman scanning through a sword cane who had no idea it was a sword cane.

“Her son was a service member and had sent it to her from the Philippines without mentioning what it was.”

Then there was a couple headed up to Alaska with a sink, “complete with plumbing attached, in a large duffle bag”. That doesn’t come close to one particular arms dealer though who tried to check in an automatic grenade launcher built out of clear polycarbonate. The security officer discovered that it was so the dealer’s customers could see the weapon’s inner-workings.

“Would have been fine, if it hadn’t been undeclared and accompanied by a small box of grenades.”

Then of course there’s the purely delusional whom security have also noted. One particular female passenger was screaming the whole time her bag was getting scanned.

“She was screaming that x-rays weren’t real, and there was a midget in the machine going through her bag to steal things,” explained one security officer.

As a precautionary tale, airport security say that if you’re still wearing money belts through scanners in fear of thievery, you’ll be flagged.

“Every time they fly internationally they strap themselves with a money belt under their clothes instead of just putting their money in their hand luggage,” explains one security guard.

“They get taken aside and searched every single time, because it obviously looks suspicious as fuck, but when I say, ‘Hey, why not just put it in your bag and you won’t get searched?’ They say ‘no’ because they think that someone will open their bag, find the money, take it out, close the bag again, and somehow run away in the time it takes to put the bag through security.”

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The post Weirdest Things People Try To Smuggle On Planes appeared first on DMARGE Australia.

Black leather boots, black suit, no accessories. If this stark red carpet combination surprises you then you don’t know Keanu Reeves…and you definitely don’t know John Wick.

Over the weekend the the 54-year-old actor made a rare appearance to promote the third instalment of his latest outing as the world’s most loved (and deadliest) assassin, John Wick. The special screening took place in London and had Reeves donning what is most likely a spiffy Saint Laurent suit given his surprise announcement as the French luxury label’s latest ambassador last week.

As you can see Keanu’s choice in footwear is far from the polished streets of Pitti Uomo – no double monk straps, no derby lace-ups, no loafers. Instead he’s opted for chunky leather hiking boots which are likely YSL items as well. The boots could even pass as casual motorcycling boots, a well-known past time of the actor. The heel itself is raised to give a proper ‘tactical’ look to what is otherwise a very sparse suit that only Keanu Reeves could pull off.

Whilst there is a lack of watch, pocket square and general colour, a closer look at the suit reveals that Reeves’ shirt and tie is actually a midnight navy hue with a slight sheen. It’s flat enough to satisfy the dark John Wick aesthetic and slick enough to be considered stylishly minimalist.

And here’s Reeves decked out in full Saint Laurent kit for the 2019 campaign. Like a fine wine, Mr. Wick. A fine wine…and let’s hope there’s more to come. Just leave the pencils out as props on shoot day. Oh, and in case you didn’t get the ‘tactical’ reference, here’s Reeves suiting up with his tailor in all his glory.

Read Next

• It’s Time You Perfected The All Black Outfit & Here’s How To Do It
• A Guide To Wearing Dress Boots For Work & Play

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